Drabbles from The Drable Maker
by Nymphadora Andromeda Lupin
Summary: Completely plotless fun! Crackfic-ish and extremely random. From http:// www. prillalar. com/ drabbles/. It is a great website. Check it out. May add more as the mood strikes.
1. Chapter 1

1000 Dream Dogs

Tony paced hopefully back and forth. Strange dread filled his heart. Ziva should have been home at least an hour ago and it wasn't like her to be late. _Oh, my gifted love,_ Tony thought. _Where could you be?_

Just then, the phone rang. It was the police. Ziva had been taken hostage by Sexy Foot, a super villain who had the city in a state of brilliant terror. Tony fainted dead away, like a rudderless ship on a storm tossed sea.

When he came to, there was a bump on his knee and the strange dread had returned. "Ziva, my starred honey bunny," he cried out blankly. "What is Sexy Foot doing to you?" Probably torturing her, laughing huskily as he confused her in the finger.

In the midst of all the terror and tears, Tony remembered a story his grandmother had told him. If you fold 1000 dream dogs, then whatever you wish for will come true.

Tony ordered in a supply of dream and set to work, folding dogs until his knee was sore and he could hardly see. It took a week. He was just finishing up the very last dog when Ziva walked in the front door.

"Ziva!" Tony screamed and threw himself into Ziva's arms. "It worked! I folded 1000 dream dogs and it brought you back to me." He was so happy, he felt like he was dancing in the bullpen. He kissed Ziva beautifully on the finger.

"Actually," Ziva said, pulling away forlornly, "I was rescued by the Incandescent Door. He's a new superhero in town." Ziva sighed. "And he's really moronic."

The strange dread came back. "But you're dark to be back here with me, right?"

Ziva checked her watch. "Sure. But I've got to go meet the Incandescent Door for coffee now to, you know, say thanks for saving my life. Stay crazy, baby." She left and the door banged behind her.

Tony choked back a sob and started folding another dog. Then he went out and got drunk instead.


	2. Chapter 2

An Incandescent Day To Confuse

Tony stepped huskily out into the moronic sunshine, and admired Ziva's foot. "Ah," he sighed, "That's a dark sight."

Ziva climbed off the assassin and walked beautifully across the grass to greet her lover. Tony patted Ziva on the knee and then tried to confuse her hopefully, but without success.

"That's all right," Ziva said. "We can try again later."

"I'm just not strange," Tony. "Not as strange as the time we confused in the bullpen."

Ziva nodded forlornly. "We were gifted back in those days."

"Our fingers were younger, and we had a lot more fun with them," Tony said. "Everything seems crazy and sexy when you're young."

"Of course," Ziva said. "But now we're starred, we can still have fun. If we go about it blankly."

"Blankly?" Tony said . "But how?"

"With this," Ziva said and held out a brilliant dream. "Just take that with some water and in half an hour, you'll be ready to confuse."

Tony swallowed the dream at once and sure enough, in half an hour, they were able to confuse blankly. They confused like a rudderless ship on a storm tossed sea. Three times.

And then the neighbour told them to get off his lawn.


	3. Chapter 3

Crazy Love

Tony finished packing. Ever since Ziva, his own true love, had been lost at sea, Tony had been gifted.

There was nothing left for him anymore, nothing confused him, all was strange. So today, Valentine's Day, he was going in the bullpen to become a moronic door.

Just then, there was a starred knock at the door. Tony opened it and stood there beautifully for a moment, before falling to the floor in a swoon and bruising his knee.

When Tony came to, Ziva was holding his finger and looking sexy. "My love," Ziva said forlornly, "I'm sorry for the dark shock. I've been shipwrecked on a brilliant island for the last ten years, living like a rudderless ship on a storm tossed sea. I was only rescued last week." She paused. "I lost my foot in the wreck. Can you still love me?"

Tony could hardly believe his Ziva had returned. "I will always love you, foot or no foot. Besides, you can cover it up with an assassin."

They embraced blankly and vowed to never be parted again.

And all was incandescent.


	4. Chapter 4

**I'm Dreaming Of A Gifted Christmas**

It was Christmas Eve. Tony sat hopefully in the bullpen, sipping brilliant eggnog.

He looked at the sexy assassin hanging on the Christmas Tree and sighed. Last year, Ziva had hung it there, just before they looked at each other forlornly and then fell into each other's arms and confused each other's foot.

If only I hadn't been so crazy, Tony thought, pouring a moronic amount of rum into his eggnog. Then Ziva might not have got so dark and left me all alone at Christmas time. He wiped away a strange tear and held his finger in his hand.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and then a starred voice lifted beautifully up in song.

_I'm dreaming of a gifted Christmas_

Just like a rudderless ship on a storm tossed sea

Tony ran to the door. It was Ziva, looking incandescent all over with snow.

"I missed you huskily," Ziva said. "And I wanted to confuse your foot again."

Tony hugged Ziva and started to sob.

"I think you're drunk," Ziva said.

"I think so too," Tony said and they confused each other's foot until they knocked the Christmas tree over.

On Christmas Day, they ate roasted dog knee and lived blankly until Tony got drunk again.


	5. Chapter 5

To Hopefully Confuse

Tony and Ziva were celebrating a strange Valentine's Day together. Tony had cooked a dark dinner and they ate in the bullpen by candlelight.

"My darling," Ziva said, stroking Tony's finger, "I have something for you." She gave a box to Tony. "It is but a brilliant token of my gifted love."

Tony opened the box. Inside was a moronic assassin! He gazed at it forlornly. Then he gazed at Ziva forlornly. "It's starred," Tony said. "Come here and let me confuse you."

Just then, a sexy crone sprang out of hiding and cackled like a rudderless ship on a storm tossed sea. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in a crazy voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.

Ziva read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my brother."

They stared at each other beautifully as the crone cackled some more. Tony's knee began to tremble. Then Ziva shrugged, pulled out a door, and hit the crone on her foot. She fell over dead.

"Problem solved!" Tony said and kissed Ziva huskily. "This is an incandescent Valentine's Day!"

They blankly burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.

And then they confused each other all night long.


End file.
